Community Wesleyan Church Newark
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Intimacy

loneliness is not just a covid problem, its a modern problem.  we were designed to be together.  in the beginning, we were created in the image of a triune god, a divine community of persons.  in john 17, jesus prayed that we "may be one as we are one".  think about that!  The desire of god is that we might enjoy the unity experienced by the father, son and holy spirit.  incredible!

it should come as no surprise that since humans were designed to be in community, loneliness is damaging.  In fact, loneliness is as damaging to the body as smoking a pack of cigarettes every day.  our minds, spirits and bodies were not intended to be self-sufficient, isolated or lonely.

interestingly, it's not enough to desire community.  if you're american, you were born and raised in the most individualistic culture of all time!  in order to make progress, we need to work at it.  intimacy won't feel normal.

the rapid infection of pornography and sexualization has added yet another layer to the loneliness problem.  in our culture, 'intimacy' is commonly thought of as synonymous with sex.  as a small group leader, it's important to keep this bent in mind.  your desire and effort to develop intimacy in the healthy relationships of your group may be interpreted through over-sexualized eyes and ears.  intimacy is much more than just sex.

intimacy refers to the depth of relationship.  we all have acquaintances, those people who we know as the friend of a friend, the person behind the counter, the guy on the phone, the mechanic.  while these relationships may have a level of health, they are not fully utilizing the potential of healthy relationship.  intimacy is about removing the barriers, increasing the connection and growing the potency of the relationship.

A Group Without Intimacy

How do I know if my group lacks intimacy?
  • hesitation to give in to each others ideas and influences
  • rare instances of validation and meaningful encouragement
  • common barriers with those who have a "wall" up
  • lack of compassion and invested concern for one another

Leading In Intimacy

intimacy does not grow on accident.  if your small group struggles in this area, a plan is needed.  While the four training areas will be helpful in the long run, here are some quick ideas:
  • ask questions
  • work at becoming an aggressive listener...think: "I want to understand!"
  • verbal affirm intimate actions from others
  • encourage your most intimate members and thank them for their influence

Characteristics of Intimate Relationships

Over the next twelve months, we'll focus on four characteristics of healthy relationships: vulnerability, accountability, coaching and intervention.  During the month of any particular focus, you'll have an opportunity to dig deep in personal growth, leadership development and application to your specific small group.  You'll be able to work with other small group leaders to discover what is working and not working in their environment.  Click on one of the characteristics below to learn more!

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​161 Myrtle Ave, Newark, OH 43055
​740.366.4220
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  • About
  • I'm New
  • Ministries
    • Groups
    • Family
    • Serve
  • StepUp
  • Events
  • Give